Four years ago today

Today we celebrate the day we held our daughter for the very first time.

Four Amazing Years!

How time flies! How blessed we are!

Following is a long post intended for Linzi. It is an excerpt from my journal and the Lifebook that I am still creating. You can watch our Family Day video here.

September 12, 2004. . .

I was wide awake at 3:30 am, Partly due to jet lag, but mostly due to excited and jittery nerves. This was the day I had waited and dreamed of for so long! I wanted to jump out of bed and get on with the day. I needed to be busy, actively moving closer to my daughter. We still had to catch a plane, travel another 1100 miles and travel by bus for another hour to hour and a half before we arrived at our destination. As I lay there urging the clock to move faster, I thought about my sweet baby sleeping for the last time in a crib in the orphanage. Little did you know, your little world was about to be turned upside down! Soon, your nannies would wake you, feed you and get you ready for your journey to Lanzhou, the city where we would finally meet!

11:00 am - Our flight followed the path of the Great Wall from Beijing to Lanzhou. Somehow, our seats had gotten scattered on the plane and Daddy and I were separated on our flight. This was fine because I was lost in my own thoughts, too emotional to even try to have a conversation. I sat in the window seat and stared out the window for 1100 miles, trying to grasp the reality that the time was actually HERE! I wrote a note to you to be added to my journal and as I wrote, the tears of joy spilled over. How was I ever going to hold it together enough to not scare you?!!! Looking back at that piece of paper, I can hardly read my writing - I was a wreck!

3:30 pm - After the long bus ride from the airport to the hotel, we were told to report to the 4th floor conference room to meet our babies! It was cold and rainy in the city of Lanzhou. The pollution cast a thick fog over the already dreary day. But inside the Sunshine Plaza Hotel (most appropriately named!) the room was aglow with the happiness of seven families and the bright future waiting for eight children. We watched the nannies come in and immediately, I spotted you. You were wrapped in a pink blankie and the sight of you took my breath away. The nannies sat in a row facing the families for several minutes (seemed like forever) before they started calling names. In that time, your nanny scanned the crowd, zoomed in on us and locked eyes with Daddy and I. She NEVER stopped watching us. She knew who we were and I believe you did too! Soon after your nanny spotted us, you looked straight into my eyes and all the way to my heart. You were busy playing with your nanny one last time, but several times you stopped, looked over and stared at us - not the people in general, but US! It still amazes me that in all of the chaos, before they placed you in my arms, you already knew we belonged to you. When they finally called our names, time stood still. I felt God's presence in our lives like I never have before. How could it be that of all the children we could have been matched with, we were matched with THIS child - sweet, little wonderful you! I had known you in my heart for so long and now I was breathing the same air, feeling the warmth of your body and lost in your sweet, serious little face. Random? I think not. This was the work of God. Four years later, I am still in awe of you and all that you bring to our lives.

Happy Family Day, my sweet Lu Lu! I love you more than words can ever say. You are my heart and my joy! You make my heart smile!

Love,
Mommy